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“...Okay then. I'll need three tomatoes, a size nine-and-a-half shoehorn, a bit of string, and a small wooden spoon.”

From TPMMuckraker:

Paul Kelleher
Yes, I’m calling to inform you that my mom died on the 24th of January.

Bank of America Estates representative
I’m sorry. Oh, it looks like she never even missed a payment. That’s too bad. Well, how are you planning to take care of her balance?

Kelleher
I’m not going to. She has no estate to speak of, but you should feel free to just go through the standard probate procedure. I’m certainly not legally obligated to pay for her.

Bank of America
You mean you’re not going to help her out?

Kelleher
I wouldn’t be helping her out—she’s dead. I’d be helping you out.

Bank of America
Oh, that’s really not the way to look at it. I know that if it were my mother, I’d pay it. That’s why we’re in the banking crisis we’re in: banks having to write off defaulted loans.

Over at Alternet, Joshua Holland wants to know why we aren’t rioting yet. Good question.

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